I finally remembered the story I wanted to tell. This one is yet another story which involves the Communist and Welcher, Dave “The General” Stegall. At the time, Dave was living in Chicago. June 18th, 2003, we had tickets to the Pearl Jam concert at the United Center. I got down to Chicago in the afternoon. Admittedly we prepartied quite bit before the concert. We decided to take the “L” to the United Center. The nearest station wasn’t far from Dave’s apartment and we put $5 on a ticket to ride the “L”
. At the time, it didn’t dawn on us that it wouldn’t be enough money to get to the concert and back, since a ride on the “L” is $1.50. Some simple sober math would have allowed us to realize that we needed to put $6 on the ticket. But as I said we were drinking a little bit before the concert. We manage to get to the concert with out any real major incidents. Our seats were in the upper level, which at the United Center seems like you are
watching the show from Kenosha. Nonetheless, it was a great concert. Dave and I actually continued to imbibe alcoholic beverages in the show. I believe I managed to smuggle in a flask of Captain Morgan’s. This is not a shock to anyone who knows me. After the show we exited the United Center and needed to find the “L” station to get back to Dave’s apartment, and in fact it was a Wednesday, so I actually had to drive back up to Milwaukee and work in Fond du Lac the following day. I thought I knew which direction to go, but it was really foggy, and the addition of alcohol helped me lose my bearings. Yes it was so foggy that we couldn’t see the tallest building in the Midwest. Next thing we knew, we were walking down some street with warehouses on either side and there were no street lights. It looked like the streets that the gang members were hanging out on in the beginning of Michael Jackson’s “Beat It” video. After walking around in what I would consider a bad part of town,
we finally found the “L” station. By this time, it was around 1 in the morning and there was no one else around on the entire “L” platform. Dave put in the ticket and walked through the turnstile. Then he handed the ticket back to me. The ticket that only had $0.50 left on it and $1.50 is needed to get through the turnstile. This wasn’t one of those single bar at the waist turnstiles, it was the 7 foot tall with bars every 6 inches and has 4 quadrants like the one shown in the photo. The sides of the turnstile was made of Plexiglas. I put the ticket in and started walking through the turnstile. It clicked once and then didn’t click the second time to let me out and it would not click back the other way to let me out on that side. I was trapped. This is not good. Let me reset the scenario, I was stuck in a turnstile at the “L” station down by the United Center, at 1 in the morning on a now Thursday, Dave is already on the other side and is laughing so hard he is on the verge of losing control of bodily functions. The turnstile would a little bit past the end of the Plexiglas side wall. By a little bit, I mean maybe 6 inches if that. After quickly
analyzing the situation I realized the only way out would be to squeeze through this tiny opening. Some how, using mostly adrenaline, I managed to get my head through that space and once my head got through I was able to pull the rest of my body through that same area. I am sure I looked like that guy who can squeeze his entire body through a toilet seat that performs at halftime of Bucks games every once in a while. Once through Dave said to me that there was no way that he could have fit through there. I managed to get back to my house in Milwaukee by 4:30 in the morning. Just enough time to sleep an hour and a half before headed up to Fond du Lac for work.
. At the time, it didn’t dawn on us that it wouldn’t be enough money to get to the concert and back, since a ride on the “L” is $1.50. Some simple sober math would have allowed us to realize that we needed to put $6 on the ticket. But as I said we were drinking a little bit before the concert. We manage to get to the concert with out any real major incidents. Our seats were in the upper level, which at the United Center seems like you are 
watching the show from Kenosha. Nonetheless, it was a great concert. Dave and I actually continued to imbibe alcoholic beverages in the show. I believe I managed to smuggle in a flask of Captain Morgan’s. This is not a shock to anyone who knows me. After the show we exited the United Center and needed to find the “L” station to get back to Dave’s apartment, and in fact it was a Wednesday, so I actually had to drive back up to Milwaukee and work in Fond du Lac the following day. I thought I knew which direction to go, but it was really foggy, and the addition of alcohol helped me lose my bearings. Yes it was so foggy that we couldn’t see the tallest building in the Midwest. Next thing we knew, we were walking down some street with warehouses on either side and there were no street lights. It looked like the streets that the gang members were hanging out on in the beginning of Michael Jackson’s “Beat It” video. After walking around in what I would consider a bad part of town, 
we finally found the “L” station. By this time, it was around 1 in the morning and there was no one else around on the entire “L” platform. Dave put in the ticket and walked through the turnstile. Then he handed the ticket back to me. The ticket that only had $0.50 left on it and $1.50 is needed to get through the turnstile. This wasn’t one of those single bar at the waist turnstiles, it was the 7 foot tall with bars every 6 inches and has 4 quadrants like the one shown in the photo. The sides of the turnstile was made of Plexiglas. I put the ticket in and started walking through the turnstile. It clicked once and then didn’t click the second time to let me out and it would not click back the other way to let me out on that side. I was trapped. This is not good. Let me reset the scenario, I was stuck in a turnstile at the “L” station down by the United Center, at 1 in the morning on a now Thursday, Dave is already on the other side and is laughing so hard he is on the verge of losing control of bodily functions. The turnstile would a little bit past the end of the Plexiglas side wall. By a little bit, I mean maybe 6 inches if that. After quickly 
analyzing the situation I realized the only way out would be to squeeze through this tiny opening. Some how, using mostly adrenaline, I managed to get my head through that space and once my head got through I was able to pull the rest of my body through that same area. I am sure I looked like that guy who can squeeze his entire body through a toilet seat that performs at halftime of Bucks games every once in a while. Once through Dave said to me that there was no way that he could have fit through there. I managed to get back to my house in Milwaukee by 4:30 in the morning. Just enough time to sleep an hour and a half before headed up to Fond du Lac for work.
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