Making Love to School Boys

I don't know why, but when I woke up this morning this story was in my head. Again this is a college story and it happened up in Oshkosh. I went to a house party with Schmidty and The General. It was shortly after the movie "Dumb and Dumber" came out. Anyhow, we were hanging out at this house party and Schmidty could do the whistle thing that Jim Carrey does, you know the part where he says "Tractor beam sucked me right in." So Schmidty kept on doing that. And then the flood gates opened for all of us doing lines from the movie. After a couple minutes of we all dried up on good lines. Then a couple of minutes later I remember what I thought was a great line from the movie. Schmidty was talking to someone else so I was talking a little louder saying his name. "Schmidty...Schmidty....SCHMIDTY!!!" He turned to listen to me and as I was beginning to speak, there was a break in the music between songs, and pretty much a lull in the conversation in the entire room, and I yell out "I desperately want to make love to a school boy!!!" Everyone in the room heard me, paused for a second and then in mild horror looked at me like I was a pedophile. I took that moment to excuse myself from the room to go and refill my beer. Moments later The General and Schmidty found me by the half barrel and asked me what the hell that was all about. I told them that it was a line from the movie. They said "Really?" as if they didn't believe me and no longer wanted to be my friend. I told them to trust me and watch the movie again. It is funny now, but at the time that was worse than a fart in church.

Oh and Krum, if you are reading this, I found a picture that you may consider art. This is from the camping trip on the Mississippi. You see the tree in this picture is a symbolism of the struggles of life and a display of the will to stay alive even as the ground around it is eroding away. The tree continues to cling to the earth it has to remain in existence. It is a yet another cruel lesson of the brutality of mother nature. Much like seeing a wildebeest meeting it's final destiny along a river on the plains of the seraghedi as a crocodile drags it into the water by it's lips and finishes it off with a death roll. OK maybe not, irregardless, this is also the spot where I went to the bathroom every night.